Only a little while longer…

Good morning (or night, if you’re reading this at night), lovelies! What a crappy month November has been, and much to my amazement, it was because I was silly and did not pick up a bottle of vitamine B12 until just last week. Wasn’t that the problem last year with my tiredness and headaches? Why yes it was, and as soon as I took some this past Friday, I felt better within an hour. Sigh… sometimes I forget the things that I actually need for myself. Never again though! It’s been atrocious… I’ve never felt so completely drained… and I know I said that about the winter semester earlier this year, but nope, that was not tired. I got sick twice this semester, and once was a huge vit B deficient week of hellish headaches.

So, it looks as though I will not be going back next semester, and honestly, I don’t mind. I don’t feel like I’m copping myself out because, well, as I’ve said before, I’m not going to be teaching, and all I really need is voice lessons and sight singing. So I will be singing with the Chorale again (as the director is awesome and completely understands my weariness of school). I just need to get out there and perform! Another reason, we are so broke! I want to finally start making moneys that we can save and spend as we choose, not just food, rent and bills. There’s an exciting prospect for the future that I’d like to save for (you’ll have to just wait for the details till we have a solid plan, but it is freaking wonderful!).

I think a break from all this hardcore music will be a good, much needed one. I can hibernate for the rest of the winter months and start getting the rest of my life back in order. After we’re ok for the moolahs, I plan on continuing with voice lessons (as that is something I’ll be doing for the rest of my performing career most likely), joining a local choir, looking into other classical performance venues, and starting up the wedding ceremony singing. I’m also excited to have more time and energy to devote to my spirituality and working on the inner bits 🙂

I hope you all are doing well! And I hope you are enjoying this dark time of the year.

And The Work Begins!

So tomorrow, it’s back to school! Not that I actually have classes tomorrow. The music department cancels classes on the first day to have an assembly and figure out when each student is going to have their private lessons. Anywho, so I’ve been kinda trying to figure out what I want to do with the singing. It’s been leaning towards being in an opera chorus (as you know if you read the last music-related post). However, I’ve been thinking lately too, and this is an old idea, but I was also thinking of doing wedding ceremony singing. Not singing at receptions, but just at the ceremonies. I like the idea of working for myself (I did it for a while last year when I was dog-sitting in Ontario). Also, I get to make people’s special days more special with the awesome powers of music! And cuz I’ve been taking classical training, I can pretty much do any sort of style too because along with classical pieces, we have to do folk/musical/contemporary pieces as well, and work on just being able to sing well without putting a specific style on it. Anywho… just an idea for now. I’m going to let this year happen and get through it before I make any decisions, but I don’t think I’ll be getting the Bachelor’s degree as honestly, it’s really only good if I want to go further and look into the more academic side and get into teaching (which is totally not my bag). What I really need is the voice lessons (obviously) and the ability to sight read and pick up languages quickly, which are things I do well already, not that I’m trying to toot my own horn, lol, but I know what my strengths are, and singing is one of the only things that I will openly say I’m good at 😛

On another note, I will also be attending a Wicca 101 class with a local group! So excited to see what comes of this! I never thought I’d ever want to really get out there in the Pagan world, always figured I was a solitary witch, but lately, I’ve been feeling such a need to get in contact with others. The class I think will be good for me as I really need to start practicing more regularly, and having to do some Pagan homework (whatever that may be) will be wonderful 🙂

The Spiritual In Music

Last night, I went to the opera. I’ve been having a bit of a hard time with what I want to do with music. I’ve always known exactly what I wanted to do with singing, first it was being a famous pop star (yes, indeed, I was young once, lol), then I wanted to star in musicals, and then it finally progressed into wanting to be an opera singer. I think the realization that there wasn’t a huge challenge with popular songs led me to the most difficult form of singing. Now, you may ask, “but what does this have to do with spirituality?”, well I shall tell you!

Like I said, I’ve been having a bit of a crisis with the one thing that’s always been so solid in my life. I wasn’t sure whether or not the Man and I were going to go last night, and after talking to my private lesson teacher, I just wanted to sleep. She talked to me about getting into opera, and that I may find that I’d like to do something else behind the scenes (which I took as, “she doesn’t think I’ve got what it takes” type thing. With being so tired and flustered from school, things just kept going slowly downward.

So we arrive downtown Vancouver to go to the Queen Elizabeth Theatre, we go inside, and it is quite a lovely place. I’m getting more excited as we wait to take our seats. After waiting, then being seated, then waiting for the conductor to finish talking to the orchestra on a last few points (it was the last rehearsal), it began. With the first few notes sung, I was almost in tears and nothing emotional had happened yet.  Then the first point that the whole chorus came on stage and a few tears slipped. I was just so overwhelmed with the feeling that “I’m home, and this is what it’s about, this is why I am doing what I am doing.”

So where does the spiritual enter here? For me, music is such an ultimate form of expression, it’s one of the very few things that gets me so incredibly passionate and free. While on stage, I feel so connected to myself, and in turn, I feel connected through my feet to the earth below the wood and concrete, and through my voice, to the Gods. In expressing the emotions and singing the melodies, I feel like I am on a completely different plane where I am surrounded by this wonderful feeling. There’s no other way for me to explain other than that I feel that I am channeling this amazing spiritual energy.

Music has always been a huge part of spirituality and religions, my favourite part of church as a child was the singing. I didn’t care that the words meant little to me, I could stand there and let my voice ring out, and hear all the voices, some beautiful, some a little tone deaf, come together to create music together as one.