A Month (or two) for Baldr – XXIII & XXIV – A Time He Helped Me

So, you may be wondering why two posts are being put into one. XXIII is supposed to be a piece of writing that I wrote myself for or about Him, however, I do not have the mental bandwidth at this moment to write anything creatively, and I’m not about to put something out into the world that I think is crap about Baldr.

So, I am continuing onward so that I can finish up these posts and not leave you, dear gentle readers, waiting for an eternity until I recover my brain capacity 🙂

In this post, I’ll share a time that Baldr has helped me.
I could list all the little ways in which He helps me everyday, though I’ve spoken about many of them already here on the blog (seeing the joy in the mundane, in life, a sense of adventure, love of nature, etc.). There hasn’t been any sort of more dire situation as of yet where I’ve desperately needed help from Him. Honestly. one would usually hope those situations don’t pop up, but such is life for someone who works with spirit, or has little control over emotions as a human being. We’re passionate creatures…

So I’ll relate my experience with my usual… let’s call it malaise… at the end of the summer. Last year, before I met Baldr, I had about a month and a half of a pretty depressed state. It wasn’t as bad as what I had had when I lived out West, especially during the winters, but it was icky enough. Very deadening.
About a week ago, I had been feeling that coming on again. Now, I have been noticing that weather really affects me since returning to Ontario. Big storms give me headaches, the humidity really brings on a very lethargic mood. It was dark, rainy, and dreary (almost like Vancouver weather, honestly), and I was slipping back into that icky place.
Now, I have been quite lucky this year as no depressive moods had come over me so far, so I figured it was about that time for one anyway. Well, Baldr kept popping up in my thoughts, stuck around, where it is usually hard for me to feel connected to any of Them. He wasn’t being pushy, just remained with me.

I endured the week, sleeping lots, but still going outside to look in the garden, to be with growing things as thoughts of green filled me. He was there, gentle, but supportive, moving me forward to see that I still have my obligations to Him, to Them, and to my mortal kin. It’s ok to take time for myself, and honestly, this summer has been so busy and filled with people. As someone who generally avoids the overstimulation that happens with many people like the plague, this summer has pushed on that a bit. Granted, most things involved family, so situations were filled with people I know and like, it’s still difficult to have to just continue talking about things, having to find interesting things to say even though I’m quite far removed from what’s considered “normal”.

And yet, He showed me the benefit in that, in being with those who care, with sharing things with them, and hearing what they have to share in return. It has been busy, yes, but not as draining as I would have expected such a people filled season would be.

I would come back to Him after it was all done, and w/We’d just be, just enjoy each other’s company.

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